“You must!” said the stoner. But then he added, “Unless you disagree with it.” While he said this, he was picking trees out of the carpet and placing them back into the bowl of a bong. It was said that no person had ever recovered more than half of the trees they lost to a […]

The stoner was rolling a joint when a pothead exclaimed, “I’m sick of you telling us what to do! If you’re such an expert, I challenge you: Let’s see who can get the highest by this time next week.” The stoner accepted. They would meet in one week, and whoever was higher would win. The […]

A friend of the stoner asked him, “What is the best way to climb?” The stoner replied, “Let me tell you a story,” and this was it: A man was walking down the street, smoking a blunt. He passed a man who was smoking a joint, and the joint smoker thought, “Blunts ruin the taste […]

When he was younger, the stoner had a friend who did not smoke. The stoner wanted her to try trees, for he was certain if she tried them, she would love them. So he would tell her, “When you smoke, your thoughts wander down a thousand hidden paths in a vibrant green forest, where sunlight […]

The stoner said, “Two natures arise from the substance of trees: indica and sativa. The Metaphysics says more about this, but I will not bore you with the details.” The stoner explained this to a cat while rolling a joint on the couch. The cat stared up at the stoner from the carpet of the […]

The stoner’s friends watched as he loaded his pipe: he picked apart his trees, sprinkled them into the bowl, and packed them down with his thumb until they looked like a well-kept garden. Then he picked up the pipe, and he passed it to the left. His friend to the left said, “Don’t you want […]

The stoner walked through the town square. He heard the cars going by. He felt the people brushing up against him. He smelled the oil and the sweat and the thousand other city smells. But because he followed the 420 Code, he was high above it all. When he glanced up at the clocktower, he […]

The stoner and a friend were walking down the street when the friend suggested they smoke. “Sure,” the stoner said, “but let’s go someplace private.” His friend said, “Are you embarrassed to smoke? If you were honest, you would shout it from the rooftops. If you were open, you would smoke in plain view.” But […]

An old friend visited the stoner, and the stoner said, “I have not seen you in forever. Let me smoke you out.” So the stoner got his bong, and he poured fresh water into it. He took out a bag of trees and sprinkled them into the bowl of the bong. Then he took ice […]

The stoner sat in the passenger seat and packed a bowl. His friends sat in the other seats and watched his fingers pull apart the trees and place them in his pipe. When he was done, he passed the pipe to the back seat, and he said, “Do you know about the tragedy of the […]